In my religion there would be no exclusive doctrine; All would be love, poetry and doubt. – Cyril Connolly, The Unquiet Grave

Three groups spend other people’s money: children, thieves, politicians. All three need supervision. – Dick Armey

Never invest your money in anything that eats or needs repairing. – Billy Rose

I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land. – Jon Stewart

I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book. – Groucho Marx

Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it. – Mark Twain

I believe there is something out there watching us. Unfortunately, it’s the government. – Woody Allen

Drugs have taught an entire generation of American kids the metric system. – P. J. O’Rourke

It’s better to be quotable than to be honest. – Tom Stoppard

Each morning when I awake, I experience again a supreme pleasure - that of being Salvador Dali. – Salvador Dali

Plans are only good intentions unless they immediately degenerate into hard work. – Peter F. Drucker

They shall grow not old, as we that are left grow old: Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn. At the going down of the sun and in the morning We will remember them. – Laurence Binyon, 1914

World Peace Through World Trade. – IBM slogan adopted in 1930’s by Thomas J. Watson, CEO from 1915-1956

Do not try to do too much with your own hands. Better the Arabs do it tolerably than you do it perfectly… Actually also, under the very odd conditions of Arabia, your practical work will not be as good as, perhaps, you think it is. – T.E. Lawrence’s advice to his British superiors

I have the heart of a child. I keep it in a jar on my shelf. – Robert Bloch

Change before you have to. – Jack Welch

Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut. – Ernest Hemingway

I shall never use profanity except in discussing house rent and taxes. – Mark Twain

Men become wise just as they become rich, more by what they save than by what they receive. – Wilbur Wright

Occupation is the scythe of time. – Napoleon Bonaparte